I have learned a few things about myself…I am a lot stronger than I ever give myself credit for, while I don’t like to concede defeat, I also know when to let an argument go, and that while I may not always understand other people’s motivation or perceptions of reality, I don’t have to fight to be right or understood…sometimes the argument is not worth the pain of it all.
Last week delivered a blow to my carefully constructed view of the world. And then this week, when I finally asked for clarification, I realized that I was misunderstood and that someone else’s perception of what I had meant or said was not how I saw the situation. And that was hard. Normally I would fight until I felt my situation was clear, until I won and they saw my side of it. But looking at the situation, I can see how that person could have misinterpreted (and I do say that as it was never my intention as it was explained back to me) and I can see how his past colored his view of the situation.
And at this point it is too late to change it. And I am surprisingly ok with that. No desire to fight it out.
I have some healing to do. And I’m sure that all this will make me overly cautious next time something happens. But an old friend from high school had this to say on Facebook and it was so wise:
Why do we keep chasing after people who have no desire to be in our lives anymore when we should let them go so that God can bring in the people that belong there?