personal

Ask or Guess part 2

Yesterday I posted a new post about ask vs. guess people.  And I identified myself as a guess person.  And overnight I thought a lot about what that really meant in my life and how it impacted my view of the world.

  • I am not someone who easily makes or holds on to friends.  I never really sat down to figure that out, and I could be completely wrong, but I can think of several “Guesser” qualities that could contribute.
    • I am reluctant to call some people because they might be too busy and I will feel rejected.
    • I am reluctant to reach out to people who may not be receptive to it.
    • I am  not inclined to continue to put myself out there if I get no response at first try.
    • Once the initial connection has been established, if you move or circumstances change – like you move away, or we met at work and you get a new job, or the group we were both in ends – I find it difficult to reach back out to that person.  I assume that since the initial reason we met has gone away, you are probably not interested in keeping it going.
  • I do not negotiate.  I am not good at it.  Not in car buying, not in salary negotiations, not at yard sales.  And a large part of it comes down to asking for more or less (as the case may be) than was offered.  Makes me an easy target and/or holds me back from what I could be achieving.

I am still processing the rest of the my thoughts on this…maybe there will be a part 3.

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