personal, Rant

Maybe It’s Because You’re Fat

I read this article today on the Boundless Blog – The Line – about well…being fat.  At least being fat from the perspective of someone who isn’t fat.  Yep.  I have issue with this on a lot of levels…you can’t know unless you have been there.  And you can’t realize the damage you can do to someone who is still there.

So this guy was on a singles forum and there was a girl who complained – or commented? – that she had not ever been on a date.  Her profile picture was attached to the posting.  And he thought “Maybe it’s because you’re fat.”  That very well may be true.  I can testify to that sort of life.  But – and this is where I object to the article – he resorted to calling her names.  In trying to describe her he said fat, morbidly obese (neither of which I had issue with) and “an unhealthy beach ball of a woman” … there is it.  Name calling.

It was unnecessary.  It was uncalled for.  I agree with most of what he had to say but he really lost me when he resorted to that description.  He could have stopped at the medical terms.  But in his rush to “be real” and to “tell the truth” he resorted to name calling.  And there I draw the line.

I did comment.  I told him he crossed the line.  They may post it, they may not.  Who knows.  And coming from a fat girl, you may think I am oversensitive.  And maybe I am.  But I have spent my whole life worrying about weight and appearance and looks and how people perceive me.  I have no misconceptions about the life I live.  I know I am fat.  I know I am morbidly obese.  I know people can be bothered by it.  I know it cuts down my social life.  I know most men don’t like it.  And I know if I don’t change it I will end up alone, or worse, dead.  I know all that.

What I don’t need is someone acting as if I am oblivious to it.  I know.  You don’t have to drill it home to me.  I live it everyday.  And you don’t.

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4 thoughts on “Maybe It’s Because You’re Fat”

  1. Something wouldn’t let me refrain from commenting on this on. Although I cannot associate with this article, I can associate with the Revenge of the Nerds comments I often got growing up as a child – which I still feel haunt me as an adult (I thought as we got older all this stuff went away…?)

    Bottle thick glasses, braces and bad haircuts (and still working on the haircuts). But I know that God loves me and as long as I am His child – life is good.

    So here is to all the Proverbs 31 women out there! Don’t let anyone ever make you feel discouraged because of the “ideal woman” society says we should be! I love you sister!!

  2. Thought you might like to know that he revised the article to remove the offensive language! So glad you and others spoke up.

    “The thing is, she was morbidly obese [offensive phrase removed by the author].”

    Actually, I viewed a cached version – it appears they may have deleted the post entirely…

  3. I couldn’t even find the article…

    I just wanted to let you know that the “image craze” hurts all women–it’s unfair to you and it’s unfair to me, too. As a woman who happens to be small, curvy and am forever being reminded that I’m “cute”–the hurt is there from a different angle. I find that I often feel that I am valued only because of my looks–something I am completely unable to change. It hurts me to feel that men are interested in me because of my looks…and it hurts me to think that I might get treated better than a more worthy woman…because of nothing I’ve done. The injustice touches us both…but God is not unjust.

    I just want to encourage you to keep striving for the Lord, worshiping Him with your mind, body and heart–and trusting Him. Care for your body to the best of your ability, as something precious, and trust that the Lord accepts you as His beloved bride.

    Blessings,

    Abigail @ Pearls and Diamonds

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