2015 In Review

Some years by the time I reach this week, I don’t really want to think back on the year.  At least not MY year.  I know I learned things, I know I went through things, I know I am ending the year a different person than I was when the year started.  This year, I need to reflect just a bit.  Lessons were hard and fast this year and there were a lot of firsts that I never saw coming.  So here is my 2015 in review.

  1.  Well the big story of the year was that I got cancer and had to have a hysterectomy.  I have written about it already, so I will only say – cancer sucks…even when you only have a little of it.
  2. I had a lot of medical firsts:  first overnight stay in a hospital, first surgery, first IV, first CT scan, first time I had an infection that I couldn’t seem to fight off, first time I had a doctor fat shame me.
  3. I bought a new car this year.  Goodbye Sonata, hello Elantra.
  4. I completed my first year in my own apartment and made the decision to stay for another year.
  5. I also completed my first year of working at home and found what I like and what I don’t like about it.
  6. I officially hit the one year mark with J and determined that while some things get easier and easier, my mind can invent difficulties.  He deals with it better than I do.
  7. Due to #1, my hormones have been a mess this last half of the year.  Never before have I had these kinds of emotional highs and lows.  Crying is a daily part of my life in a way it never was before.  Hope it doesn’t last much longer.
  8. I got fired by a client and I have never been so happy about anything. I was being pulled off the client anyway and truthfully, they didn’t fire ME, they fired my company, but still – a very good thing indeed (to quote Martha Stewart).  And the bonus is my stress level has been MUCH MUCH lower as a result.
  9. I found friends at church this year.  My SS class has been an absolute blessing.  Considering I don’t have a lot in common in my everyday life with most of them and I am old enough to be the parent of some of them, they have been so loving and kind and open and I have enjoyed getting to know each of them.  I look forward to going each week and I miss them when I am not there.
  10. I sang this year in the PT at church and I don’t think I really realized how much I missed it.  Over the years, I have sung in many groups, but the contemporary praise team format is still my favorite.
  11. I have had times this year where I looked back at current and lost friendships and tried to put them into perspective.
  12. I have longed for what I don’t have and gotten sick of what I do.  That is both about physical “things” and emotional/intellectual/spiritual things as well.
  13. I read too little and watched too much.
  14. I worked harder the first half of the year and was blessed with a last half of the year that was not as stressful at work – allowing me some relief when it came to my outside of work issues this year.
  15. I spent too much money on things I didn’t NEED and realized I need a better plan for next year.
  16. I missed J daily.
  17. I wrote blog posts (although not as often as I would have liked).
  18. I created and I found things inspiring and I tried to put out some good in the world.

Even with a very full year there are many things for 2016 that I need to work on.  A few I am praying about:

  1. The single biggest decision is: I still need to decide about bariatric surgery.  I will start the year as if it is happening and that means it is going to be a tough 6 months leading up to my decision and then if the surgery happens it will be an even tougher road after.
  2. I need to clear out some of the mess of my life.
  3. I need to concentrate on me this year.  As my word of the year implies, I need to find what makes me HAPPY.  And most days I am still searching for that.

1 thought on “2015 In Review”

  1. Wishing you a wonderful New Year! Remember that GOD always have plans in our life, let HIM be the center of it. GOD BLESS YOU!

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